Now Playing Tracks

1boo:

greencrook:

The first time someone tried to steal my bag in the subway I panicked and I broke his arm with an umbrella and since then none of my friends will let me forget about this.
If you think this was a badass moment you need to remember I’m 5 ft and my bag was a Lucky Star bag and I was crying while hitting someone much bigger than me repeatedly with a frog-shaped umbrella. 

you are my hero

danglingthpider:

castielmyspell:

taco-of-the-violets:

castielmyspell:

things people do in fanfic no one does in real life

  • smirk every frickin five seconds
  • gulp
  • stutter to be cute
  • be like “yeah ok” when asked to call someone “daddy”
  • chuckle gently
  • chuckle in general
  • make simple misunderstandings into the biggest bitch fest you will ever experience
  • NO ONE CHUCKLES IT DOESN’T HAPPEN

I chuckled so hard at this

fuck off

*smirks*

(Source: osrick)

best-intentions:

lemounade:

lemounade:

if you started liking arctic monkeys after AM came out i don’t like you

indirect to every arctic monkeys “”“fan”“” at my school

God forbid someone isn’t fortunate enough to be introduced to a band until a v successful album is brought to their attention which they connect to and like and then discover all the music they’ve missed from them. wow sorry people are introduced to bands at different time periods.

(Source: suxxulents)

thebloggerbloggerfun:

teafortrouble:

eteo:

fall-for-nothing:

trickster-eridan:

buttpilgrim:

scientificperfection:

kittiesinthemorning:

I just don’t understand how this happened. But here’s a picture of a lemon from my backyard

WHAT THE EVERLOVING FUCK

when life gives yoǘ̻̬͓͎̣̟̩̦͢ ͪ̂̀̆҉̳̘̝̺̀l͇̬̹̞̻̥͕̥̗̒̎ͩ̋ͥ͆e͙̭̭̠̣̠̊́ͩ̂̓̀ṃ̛̍̂͛̈̏o̠̪̪ͤ͗͘n̵͉̣ͭͧ̿ͧ͛̀s̷̠͑ͬͫͦ̅͡ ̸͐ͤ͘҉̦̺M̰̹͙͇ͮ̉ͫͅȦ̻̔̅̇̑ͭ͛͋͘K̠̻̫̤̇̀ͥE͂ͪ͏̱̤͚͕ ̞͔̜̬̑ͯ͑͢ͅŞ͔̦̩̳̣̖ͮ͊ͨA͈̓͂̈́̀̀̚͘C̡̠̟͉ͪ͆̔ͤ͂ͪR̬͙͕ͪ̀͠Ĩ̵̖͚̑̊̓́F͎͕̄Iͬͧ̀̂̑ͪ͟͏̴̪̤ͅC̢̰̝͓̗͛ͬ̔̍̓́́̚̚Ḙ̶̠̰̳̩̳̊ͭͮ̇̇̚̕S̻͖̣̰̒̈͟

it’s back

Satan lemon

every villain is lemons

And finally, dear listeners, a reminder; several concerned citizens have brought to the city’s attention an irregularity surrounding this summer’s citrus harvest. City council would like to remind all enterprising fruit pickers to exercise reasonable caution when acquiring these fruits. Grasp the fruit firmly around its circumference, pull slowly but steadily to avoid damaging the tree, and under no circumstances heed its demands of you. Do not acknowledge or obey the depraved whisperings of the demon fruit.

And now: The Weather.

(Source: sometimesoverwhelming)

We make Tumblr themes